So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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