so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
