I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Randomize
