My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
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