You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
A+ Viking dick
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
