brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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