im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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