i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
