4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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