I think I am morally bankrupt
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
