I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
