your parents love me but you hate me
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
