I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
