whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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