She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
