Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I need moral support for this bender
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Randomize
