I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
