Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
