Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
She's not a foreskin expert like you
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
