I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Randomize
