i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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