Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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