As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
