It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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