It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
