Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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