so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
