At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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