I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
