it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
The Olympian is in my bed
Randomize
