It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
