My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize