Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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