My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Randomize
