Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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