your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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