physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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