this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize
