I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
