I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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