You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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