Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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