i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
