what if every blade of grass was a penis?
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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