I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
