erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
