went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
