This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
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