No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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