Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
